be brave.

206,003 notes

Dumbledore:
Welcome back to another year of Hogwarts!
Dumbledore:
I actually don't know why your parents still send you here
Dumbledore:
There's like a 30% chance you'll die tragically
Dumbledore:
And it just goes up every year
Dumbledore:
I guess that just means all your parents hate you
Dumbledore:
Great let's have some pumpkin juice

69,503 notes

shrek's kid:
dad... i'm... i'm gay
shrek:
well, better out than in, i always say, eh? heheheheh someBODY ONCE

150,599 notes

literallytrash:

itssexualhour:

My parents are both pastors and once I was fucking this one dude who’s dad was the pastor of the rival church and he whispered ‘talk biblical to me’ so i started reciting Psalms  23 and we ended up getting into a competition of who could recite the most bible versus before they cummed

you need less jesus

(Source: itssexualhour, via woolgrilling)

1 note

yellow-nova asked: Talk about the best birthday you've had.

I think the best birthday I’ve had was when I turned 17. I hadn’t had a birthday party since I was like 10, but I had one that year and my best friend came down from MN for the whole week and a bunch of friends came over on my birthday and we swam and hung out and then most people left but a few of us stayed up all night watching movies and talking and swimming in the dark and playing board games and had breakfast together in the morning and it was just such a fun, light-hearted time.

1 note

words-that-begin-with-z asked: 36

Guilty pleasures, hmmm. I can’t think of any current ones, but I used to watch far too much Wife Swap and Dance Moms. Horrid shows. Eating Nutella by the spoonful. And I used to make this really disgusting concoction of instant white rice and literally any and all condiments in the fridge.

Filed under replies though the rice thing was really more of an ED thing sooo

720,551 notes

Omfg "talk about" is a lot cuter than ask me

1:
Talk about the first time you watched your favorite movie.
2:
Talk about your first kiss.
3:
Talk about the person you've had the most intense romantic feelings for.
4:
Talk about the thing you regret most so far.
5:
Talk about the best birthday you've had.
6:
Talk about the worst birthday you've had.
7:
Talk about your biggest insecurity.
8:
Talk about the thing you are most proud of.
9:
Talk about little things on your body that you like the most.
10:
Talk about the biggest fight you've ever had.
11:
Talk about the best dream you've ever had.
12:
Talk about the worst dream you've ever had.
13:
Talk about the first time you had sex/how you imagine your first time.
14:
Talk about a vacation.
15:
Talk about the time you were most content in life.
16:
Talk about the best party you've ever been to.
17:
Talk about someone you want to be friends with.
18:
Talk about something that happened in elementary school.
19:
Talk about something that happened in middle school.
20:
Talk about something that happened in high school.
21:
Talk about a time you had to turn someone down.
22:
Talk about your worst fear.
23:
Talk about a time someone turned you down.
24:
Talk about something someone told you that meant a lot.
25:
Talk about an ex-best friend.
26:
Talk about things you do when you're sick.
27:
Talk about your favorite part of someone else's body.
28:
Talk about your fetishes.
29:
Talk about what turns you on.
30:
Talk about what turns you off.
31:
Talk about what you think death is like.
32:
Talk about a place you remember from your childhood.
33:
Talk about what you do when you are sad.
34:
Talk about the worst physical pain you've endured.
35:
Talk about things you wish you could stop doing.
36:
Talk about your guilty pleasures.
37:
Talk about someone you thought you were in love with.
38:
Talk about songs that remind you of certain people.
39:
Talk about things you wish you'd known earlier.
40:
Talk about the end of something in your life.

Filed under please? ask